Seeing My Future

It's another pajama day here in the grey, dull and rainy Midwest.  I have no where to go, no one to see and a lot of writing to do.  I have a writing assignment from my life coach.  It involves writing a very detailed description of what I want my future life partner/husband to be.  I know, I know, this all sounds really cheesy and corny to some of you, right?  Perhaps.  But it's good to be able to define what you want.  So I was directed to think of my last 4-5 relationships and make lists of what I liked and disliked about those men, then create a list from that, of what I want in my perfect partner.  

I started this list on Monday and soon set it aside because of my job search and getting together with some friends (seriously, it feels like a weekend, I've gone out twice already this week!).  It was great to catch up with one new friend who patiently allowed me to explain credit default swaps and the Goldman Sachs complaint.  And last night, celebrated the 31st birthday of my neighbour bestie, and her engagement.  Such a wonderful night and I hope she knows how much she is loved and appreciated!  It's one of the best things to give love...just because...and not look or ask for anything in return.  What you give, you end up getting, I believe.

So back to my assignment and why today is the day for me to work on this.  Even though I am talking to a new bloke, I don't really know that it's really going to work out.  And, that's okay.  I do see that he was dropped in for a purpose and I'm appreciative of that.  I was talking to one of my friends last night, just talking about life in general, boys mostly I guess, and stating that I was really looking to be in a healthy, committed relationship.  I just blurted out with a relative amount of conviction, "I deserve to be in a good, healthy committed relationship!"  I stunned myself.  Clearly, if this thought escaped my lips without me thinking about it first...it means that I don't just know it, better yet, I believe it.  Progress.  If you don't know me and my dating history, this may not mean much to you.  But it means something to me.  

And just as I deserve to be in a good, healthy, committed relationship, I believe that I deserve a great, engaging and challenging job for an ethical company who believes in diversity and giving back (and paying me!).  If you're unemployed, I hope that you believe that for yourself too.  It's easy to not believe it, when you've been torn down for months on end.  But you're surviving, right?  You're making decisions and making plans...did you know that not everyone can do that?  But you can. I was certainly stuck for a long time; this blog is a testament to that.  It's time to take charge.  Do something today that acts as a catalyst for moving forward.  If it's renting your condo out, like I'm doing, so I can be mobile...do it.  And tell me what you've done.  I'd love to hear!

Having realized, and surprised myself, that I truly believe that I deserve that kind of relationship...I know right now is the right time for me to define Mr. Right.  I'm also defining the Right Job in my mind and it's going to come along...I can just feel it.