Ok, who writes this stuff?

And worse, who believes it?! Do we really trust the status of our relationship to an online mag? Click on the title of this post to read the article. I'm astounded that cnn.com even carried this, and worse that some poor, unconfident person somewhere is defining their relationship by this. Please, let me discuss the "13 signs your relationship is doomed." Please, readers, I beg for your comments...am I off base?

1. You're a lot smarter than he is. Now this, I do not necessarily agree with. Not all men are so insecure that they cannot stand that you know more than they do about any one thing. I'm sure I know more about...cooking, than my significant other. He's really smart, as smart as I am, I am just a lot nerdier. I like that I don't have to come home to have a super nerdy conversation after a super nerdy day at work or with my friends who like to discuss the social implications of violence against women in movies and media (God bless these friends, I could not survive without them), but know that if I want to discuss esoteric financial instruments, he can keep up with me. I do, however, agree that pea soup for brains...not so attractive.
2. Residual immaturity. I don't know about this one. I dated a wonderful man who had a huge comic book collection. Of course, I didn't learn about this immediately, but it was kind of cute and he really liked reading graphic novels and such. He did not, however, spend an inordinate amount of time doing such things, but I think it's healthy and okay, to have some kind of outlet. Now, if he blows off adult responsibilities for inane, childish things...he's avoiding or just can't handle responsibilities. Make sure you know which one before you call it quits. Maybe he's just going through a rough time and needs a mindless outlet. Maybe he's avoiding you.
3. Differing opinions an A) Meal responsibility and B) palate. Okay, I speak from current experience...and past experience. My man does not like seafood, just like I do not like seafood. I like this because I don't have to painfully and politely excuse myself from any sushi-related commitments or be embarrassed that I'm the only one that doesn't like the shrimp appetizer ordered for everyone. But my man also thinks it's a burden for me to cook for him, but I love to cook. He's so sweet and understands that taking care of him and cooking for him occasionally is something I need to do. And when he wants fast food instead of my cooking, I'm not offended. I tend to think I have a slightly more refined palate than he does...but you know I love me some grilled cheese and soup! I have foodie friends with whom I can be all foodie with. And, I know plenty of happily coupled vegetarians and omnivores. This is probably, most certainly, one of the most ridiculous things on this list.
4. Grooming, bathing, hygiene take a back seat. Okay, that's not positive. I've noticed (and so has my SO) that I don't clean up the house for him as much as I used to. Is it over between us? Far from it! I decided he needs to have a realistic look at how I really do live. I'm not a slob, but I'm not like the hugest neat/clean freak ever (and that probably relieves him a wee bit). But, girls and boys, clean up your act!
5. Girl-cations and man-cations. My SO takes a yearly man-cation with his besties. He is also taking a little vacation to the Sugar Bowl (lucky) for NYE. Meh...yes, I was a little hurt that he didn't want to make it a priority to stay here with me, but who are we kidding. I'd have gone to the Sugar Bowl too! Also, we hadn't made any plans. I do think it's healthy for any relationship, no matter what level or status, to have time with your besties. Hopefully, next May when man-cation rolls around, I will still be with him. If I am and he announces he is going to Cancun once again with the boys, I will sneak a little love note in his luggage and tell him to have a good time. Absence certainly does make the heart grow fonder. And if I decide to go on a little rendezvous with my girls...I'm certainly not coming back only to announce I hate him. I'd lay the biggest kiss on him and tell him how much I've missed him.
6. TV in the bedroom. I'm not a big fan of this for multiple reasons, but I know my man likes to lay in bed watching tele....particularly football. After doing this with him once, I certainly agree. It's all about boundaries and making the commitment not to let it interfere with things best not interfered with...like, no laying in bed watching tele when you should be cleaning your totally crusted-over bathroom. Fortunately, he does not do this. But if you do find that you let TV rule, no matter where in the house it is...you might have a problem on your hands.
7. Having rugrats. Or ankle-biters. Such a lie! I plan on being the hottest mom/wife I can possibly be (hot being defined not by plastic or silicone). Why do we women get out of taking care of ourselves after we are married or have children? That gives your man a license to do the same. Make a commitment to yourself that you will not let this happen. Romance can, and should, still happen after kiddos. Your relationship should come before your kids (yes, I said it and I believe it). And kids definitely do not doom your relationship. If it does, you are just lazy.
8. Using the bathroom in each others' presence. Okay, I agree that this should not be done. Do leave some mystery. If this starts happening....start caring.
9. King size beds. Mmm...not so much. I think someone was mandated with a "come up with 13 things" and just couldn't come up with anything for #9. Seriously? King size beds? Use your imaginations people. I'm pretty sure a king size bed is not going to keep you from your partner if you really are dedicated to resolving any disagreements.
10. Half-truths to girlfriends. I have learned from experience that you should only ever tell your gal pals the good stuff! When you repeatedly verbalize bad things about your partner to your friends, don't be surprised when you feel contempt or unhappiness. Choose to honor and respect your man at all times. The constant, "he didn't do this... he didn't do that... he does that and I hate it... " etc. not only wears down any respect your friends have for him, but that you have for him as well.
11. A drastic change in appearance. ha ha. So, I am one of those girls who makes drastic changes after a bad relationship. This reminds me last night when I was explaining why I am an unconventionally attractive person, in part because of my curly hair and most men do not like curly hair, my wonderful man's response was (paraphrased), "I don't see why that makes a difference. I've been with girls who have ten different hairstyles in three months. Why would having curly hair make a difference." Of course, I also remember warning him that if I ever seriously changed my hair, it was a bad sign. If I'm in a healthy relationship and I change my hair drastically, it probably just means I've had the same one for three years and I'm bored with it. If I'm in a bad relationship...I just wait til it's over and make the changes. I can see, however, how drastic changes may signal something wrong.
12. Momma's boy or Daddy's little girl. I admit, I think this is pretty serious and certainly a red flag. I want a man who thinks for himself, don't you? Sure, he might have a good, close relationship with his mum and that's a great guide to how he's going to treat you, but do you have to have a certain type of wedding ceremony or send your kids to a certain school because that's what his mother wants and he doesn't want to disappoint his mother? That means he's not as concerned about disappointing you. That is definitely a problem. This is probably one of the only things on this list that I would absolutely never put up with and don't think you should either, for any reason.
13. "Oops, I mean..." moments. I don't think I've ever had this happen to me. I'd probably not be very happy. It's definitely a problem. I think if it happened, it should be discussed. And indeed, it might be the impetus for the end.

So I know I used my SO as a positive example in many of these. Are we perfect? No, definitely not. We have had some disagreements and such. As I've stated before, I have no idea where it's going, but it's going well right now. There's always compromise and flexibility needed in a relationship. If your partner is not willing to bend a little or you're not willing to bend, you should probably examine why not. I just really hate these lists, because mindless little people (some are known as teenagers) read these lists and think, "Oh, no! He doesn't like peanut butter...I LOVE peanut butter. It's all over!" Okay, well, hopefully really no one believes that having a king size bed is really a rational reason for believing your relationship is doomed.

If you do, please refer to #1.

Rolling...with the punches. I can do it.

It is really, really cold here. And I got my November to December electric bill and it was $160. So yesterday, I decided to turn my heat completely OFF. Brrrrrr! Well, I did turn it on for a little bit when my significant other was over. The electric blanket he so thoughtfully gave me for Christmas is really coming in handy. I have to say, it's one of the best ever presents. Very practical, especially right now, but just not something I would think to get for myself. I also have a little space heater that I am using in locations around the house where I can't use the blanket.

In addition to the high electric bill and recent Christmas presents, my car is on the fritz again. I know exactly what the problem is. But, I'm not sure if I will need it towed to the garage or not. I'm presently avoiding figuring this out because it's so cold out. Also, because it's going to be a $400+ repair along with an oil change, probably new spark plugs and a rear tail light that I need.

But, I need my car, so... I guess I should go and figure it all out.

In other news...well, there really is none at this time. I am still awaiting an interview call and a decision (not til mid-January) on another interview already conducted. While I was once hopeful, I have decided I cannot afford to be complacent in my hopefulness. It just seems like there is not much to do right now during another holiday week, but I am still looking and contacting for potential positions.

I enjoyed a wonderful evening with my significant other last night. I was struggling with some news I had received during the day and I am just really thankful that is he who he is. It is so amazing, and wonderful, to be able to truly trust someone so completely and unconditionally. I am very lucky to have him. I also noted this: I am usually the advice giver to people and usually the decision maker for myself and sometimes others, and generally believe that I know best. I am very independent and don't easily take advice from others without thinking of their ulterior motives for advising me a certain way.

With him, however, I am happy to follow his advice or decisions (not that I would ever do so completely blindly and without thinking for myself and he would not want me to). I told him that if he had to make a decision for the both of us ever, I would be able to follow it, knowing that he had put the utmost care and thought into his decision. I feel like this is an amazing breakthrough for me. I have never had the pleasure of trusting so implicitly and honestly, I feel so incredibly lucky...happy...relieved, perhaps, that with him, I would not be on my own in making decisions for us. I wouldn't have to be the only one to put all the thought and effort into planning or deciding something really, really important. I really respect his knowledge, his careful planning and ability to do this. It's oddly a huge relief and I love this about him. It's the best feeling in the world to feel confident in your partner. This is definitely a first for me and I'm really excited about it. I do not know our future together, but I wonder if this is what being in love feels like. Maybe for me, it is.

Home for the Holidays

I am home for the holidays. My home, that is. The one I have made for myself here, in the condo I have bought, with my two precious kittens. I am fortunate that I have a roof over my head and food to put on my table. I'm making a steak (medium-rare of course) with a creamy pepper sauce, and potatoes au gratin with parmesan, asiago and reggiano parmiggiano. With a $4 bottle of chenin blanc pinot grigio. Yes, that's apparently one wine. I am watching LMN Christmas movies and sitting under my electric blanket (many thanks to my significant other) and typing on my new laptop (many thanks to my best friend).

I wish I were at my parents' home. I didn't find out until yesterday that all my family was together, celebrating Christmas together and cooking up some good eats. I miss cooking with my mother and my sisters. My mother is an amazing cook and my younger sister is a chef. My older sister is also a wonderful, creative cook. When we are all home, everything revolves around the kitchen and the oh so important question, "What are we going to eat?"

But alas, my car decided to break down one more time. I know it's the O2 sensor, so it's probably a good thing I didn't try to drive home; I'd have stalled out somewhere in the middle of Nowhere, Ohio.

I appreciate the people who have been thinking about me today and sent me a text or other message to say Merry Christmas. And the gift of friendship I have received from so many this year.

It's funny that after 5 months of unemployment, I feel like one more minor setback of my broken down car, while initially an annoyance, it merely makes me think I should just put the absolute minimum insurance coverage on my car, let it sit in my parking lot and start taking the bus until I start working again. It will save me a lot of money. And, I don't go many places these days.

It does make me feel like one of those people I would roll my eyes at in a previous life. That person who had to work the retail job because s/he didn't go to college, their car always broke down, they didn't have regular transportation, things in their life always seemed a mess. Well...I guess I'd roll my eyes at me now. If it can go wrong, it probably does. My life must look like a mess to other people. I'm not that successful exec that I used to be. I'm just scraping by. But I know I must need this, to learn something.

Who ever would have thought I'd be taking the bus, shopping at consignment shops for a new interview outfit, eating pasta and soup more often than ever. Certainly not me. I'm learning to roll with the punches and make the best of what I've been given...or what's been taken away.

And that is one of the best gifts I could ever receive.

Manicotti - Baked!

So the manicotti was finished up and baked today. I really had been wanting to tackle a roux or bechamel sauce, and also add tomato sauce to it. Here is how I made the sauce for the manicotti and baked it: Preheat ovent to 350 F. Cheeses listed below should be the freshest you can find, in block form and the grate to desired amount. Equal parts flour and butter (unsalted) 1 large can of tomato sauce spices a lot of cream (heavy whipping cream) parmesan cheese parmiggiano reggiano cheese asiago cheese panko or bread crumbs First make a roux with the flour and butter. Once thickened, add the tomato sauce. If it is very thick, add enough cream to thin it out, but still remain somewhat thick. On the bottom of an oven proof pan, spread a layer of the tomato roux sauce and cover with grated parmesan. Place the manicotti on top and then cover manicotti with more tomato roux. Top with a decent layer of panko or bread crumbs. This adds an amazing texture dynamic. Grate all three cheeses on top of the manicotti and bake at 350 for 30 minutes. At 15 minutes, put about a cup and a little bit more of cream in a skillet and wisk in some flour, a slightly overfull tablespoon. Grate all three cheeses, about 1 cup plus a little more total. Heat cream on medium heat and slowly add cheese, stirring constantly. When fully incorporated and manicotti is done baking, plate manicotti and spoon the cheese sauce on top. Grate additional cheese or add additional panko/breadcrumbs on top if desired. This is probably the best dish I have created so far and will become my signature dish. Ingredients, like very good cheeses are key to making this dish a truly amazing meal that your friends and family will not likely forget.

My Get a Job Quick Scheme

So my latest and greatest version of "get a job quick" involves me getting the personal assistant job that I am probably going to be interviewing for. In my spare time, I will attend the local (and quite good) culinary school. Hopefully I will get a scholarship or enough financial aid to not have to pay for it...or not pay much. When I'm not in class or personally assisting my boss, I will be a private chef or cater small events such as wedding or baby showers, get togethers etc. Then, I can satiate my passion for cooking and make some money. I just share my latest inspiration. It comes from a) watching Ratatouille, my favourite movie; b) watching the Food Network until 2am; and c) I just can't seem to stop cooking no matter how hard I try. I'm addicted. P.S. If you know me, you should find the above picture humourous sans explanation. For those of you who don't, I am so tiny people meet me and ask if they can put me in their pocket. And this would be a great reality show or foodnetwork show: Pocket Chef!

Manicotti - Unemployed Style

Once upon a time I bought manicotti tubes and some ricotta cheese...not in the same shopping trip. But, I needed to use the ricotta before it went bad and I have been daydreaming about making some kind of manicotti with it. So, I read several recipes and then made up my own recipe. You may attempt this at home, but at your own risk; I use my own measurement system. Also, I am on a do not shop until absolutely necessary kick, so I used what I already had in my house. Enough chicken breasts--like 2-4 depending on their size. A big thing of Ricotta cheese Parmesan Cheese Spices A large dollop and half of sour cream Onion, roughly chopped Garlic, peeled and roughly chopped Peppercorns a lemon First, boil the chicken with spices (I used celery salt, a little bay leaf, garlic powder because I didn't have garlic cloves), onion, garlic and lemon (halved). You don't need to boil too long because the chicken will be cooking more later on. Once boiled, chop the chicken into rough cubes, preferably small. You can save the water from the boiling process, strain the onions etc. out and pour it into salsa jars that you have saved. After cooled, freeze. Use it later to make risotto or soup or other things. Combine the chicken cubes with the sour cream, all of the ricotta, parmesan cheese (quantity is up to you but I used a lot). Put in some spices such as oregano, basil, garlic powder. I also used a smidge of mustard powder. Okay, so...I've actually completed up to here. I have put it in the fridge and tomorrow will finish the process and this is what I'll likely do: Boil the manicotti tubes and then let them cool. Once cooled, stuff with the ricotta/chicken mixture. I will probably only bake two-four tubes at a time. I am not a huge fan of leftovers, but I am a huge fan of ready to assemble and cook/bake and eat. I doubt ricotta would freeze well, so I won't freeze them. For the sauce, I'm either going to do a bechamel sauce and add in tomato sauce or maybe I'll do an alfredo sauce mixed with pesto, or kind of a diavolo sauce. This remains to be determined. Then I'll bake the tubes as I feel like eating them, at 400 degrees F for just long enough. Eat with garlic bread. And that, my friends, is how I cook. I will post a picture as soon as I have one.

Penny for my Thoughts?

If only...I'd be rich. But then I wonder if I'd have to report that as income on my weekly unemployment benefits claim questionnaire? Hmm... I am a fan of Facebook. A few of my friends might call me an addict. It makes me laugh, rarely makes me cry, informs me of major life events in my friends' lives and today, it revealed how many of my women friends have wonderful boyfriends or husbands or partners. It makes me happy to know that the special men or women in their lives surprise them occasionally by making dinner, putting up the Christmas tree or just cleaning up the house. It's good to see them happy and secure in their relationships and I enjoy the affirmation that there are wonderful, thoughtful people out there. I'm also thinking about the very creative ways in which one who is unemployed might possibly wrap presents without having to buy a single roll of wrapping paper. I did, in fact, buy one 99 cent roll. But while I was in the dollar store, I began thinking of the random things I have around my house, unused, that I could use for wrapping. I find myself more frequently lately, racking my brain while at the store, thinking of the things I have at home...whether it's food items or extra things that could be used as little extras on gifts, or potential wrapping paper or boxes, outfits rarely worn...so that I don't have to spend money. I realised that so often, I just buy something without thinking of alternatives that I already have at home. I no longer always look for quality when I shop for myself (depending on the item of course--you just can't go with a cheap piece of steak); I seek quantity and value. I have always, always loved to grocery shop. Likely because my father was a food broker for 23 years and he loves the retail industry and well, I guess it just rubbed off. I learned from him to look at the tags on the shelf and determine which size item is the best value. No, I do not automatically buy what is least expensive or higher in quantity. For example, at a certain not to be named store, I found that buying the single sponge for 88 cents was a better value than buying the six count package. Now, I know I'm going to use 6 sponges eventually, but it's more cost effective to buy them one at a time...or six individual sponges at once. I have no idea why, but I get the biggest kick out of this. Probably because I know the stores aren't going to pull one on me. Also, I am part Dutch and we love a good deal. Tonight is Friday night. I'm staying in this evening, eating leftovers, wishing I had a cheap bottle of wine to cap off the week, organizing Christmas gifts to be wrapped or sent, thinking... about a lot of things. I am one of the lucky ones. God has been generous to me in the talent department and given me intelligence, pluck and strength. He forgot patience, but He is certainly teaching me now. I have amazing friends, cheering me on from the side lines and sometimes they step in to pinch hit for me. I have two beautiful nieces who I adore, and two crazy, fun sisters. I'm also daughter to a domestic diva who taught me more than she knows, and a dad who never let me know what we didn't have growing up. Someday, I hope to have a family of my own. I will have so much to teach them.

Great Expectations

I have given up on having expectations of any sort. I once was the sort of individual who had lots of them and they were generally quite high. Today, as I sit reflecting on the events of the last week or two, I have given up on having expectations. It started with resigning myself to my fate of joblessness. On Christmas Eve, it will have been 5 months of unemployment. Endless job searching, soul searching and the like have produced very little in the way of more than state sponsored minimal income. I did have an interview today, but there are 4 other well qualified candidates. What is there to make me expect to be hired? Nothing. I expect they will find someone internally to fill the role. Nothing will be determined until mid-January as it is. The whole roommate situation has erupted into a devastating bitterness against the goodness of humanity. I had two people inquire, appear very interested, and I scheduled viewings and meetings with both. It has been revealed that the guy, seemingly stable and mature, has a few DUIs to his name, been on probation, has a drug possession charge, and a crash that resulted in injury. He hasn't shown up to court on a few things and a $10,000 default judgment entered against him on the case of the personal injury. The girl can't seem to find the time to call or email me to tell me when she might show up to look at the place tomorrow. I remain hopelessly roommate-less. The curious case of the significant other causes me no amount of expectation. I never expect to be taken on a date. I do not expect Christmas to be any sort of event between us. I do not expect him to hang out with me this weekend. I do not expect him to want to do something with me on New Years Eve. And at the moment, I do not have the energy to ask and likely be disappointed. And that, my dear friend, is the key. Five months of disappointment, and I cannot hope to hope or expect anything to turn in my favour. It may appear for a moment, that it will, but then...look, it turns into nothing. I am tired. I am exhausted. I am alone.

Looking Up

Finally, a break in the inaction. Things are starting to look up for me. With an interview tomorrow, a roommate ready to sign on with Casa de la Moi, and the sun shining today I feel like things are ready to turn around for me. Not just me. My under-employed friend also had a job interview Monday and a second interview for Friday. It's an awesome job, in her field, and the salary on target as well. She is day dreaming about quitting her currently un-fun under-employed position. I, in turn, am day dreaming about having a roommate, which I have never had before. It will mean an extra few hundred in the pocket every month to pay off my medical bills and soon the hospital accountants can stop nagging me. After those are paid (it will take a mere two months), I will have sufficient funds to maybe even save a little bit each month. Plus, if I am working a full-time job with benefits, I will save TONS! This means that graduate school will be back on the docket for 2011. Also, I will be able to buy a new pair of black heels which I desperately need. I have had my current pair for over five years now. It is hard to find shoes, particularly a pair of wicked hot black heels, when you wear a 4.5. Once again I may be able to shop, eat out and enjoy a little bit of my old life. And, there you have it folks. Things are looking up.

Today's List

As a writer, I sometimes struggle with the mere task of typing a sentence that I actually like. But, it seems that I have an expanding audience and so, today, I will do my best on one of those days where I hate everything I write. Including those checks I just wrote to pay my bills. I guess I will just do my favourite thing to do, and create a list of what I've done this week.

1. On Sunday, I went ice skating at the local outdoor rink with a few friends. Exercise after a brief sabbatical was not as difficult as I thought it would be.
2. After ice skating I went to a local neighbourhood swap. You could swap stuff you didn't want for stuff you did.
3. I picked up a friend from the airport, dropped her off and stayed for a minute to play with her cute, energetic kitten.
4. On Monday, I had lunch with a former co-worker and discussed a job opportunity.
5. Made a few calls, responded to some emails, drew up a customized resume for a very intriguing personal assistant job that I'd be the most awesome fit for.
6. Day dreamed about personal assistant position and practiced interview questions in my head.
7. Corresponded with my wounded significant other who found out he had a torn ligament in his shoulder. He said he was excited to see me today and that made my day.
8. Today, I scheduled an interview with the former co-worker. It will be strange interviewing with former co-workers.
9. Debated the merits of the two potential positions. Remembered that I also have a temp job in the wings (potentially, of course).
10. Laundry, made a grilled cheese sandwich, made brownies for the injured man (I hear they have healing powers), held the needy cat for a while, cleaned up. I can't wait to see my significant other :)

Time for a New Chapter

And I'm not talking about in the novel that I'm writing. With a new year staring me straight in the whites of my eyes, and with many impending changes in my life, I feel like a new chapter is soon to begin. I believe there is bittersweet with every chapter in life. It means an old chapter is drawing to an end and this may mean the end to a job, a relationship, a friendship or other things that had once been sources of great happiness or even trouble. But a new chapter begins, full of possibilities and may mean the start of those same things...a job, a new relationship and new friendships that will now supply our lives with happiness. There are a few possibilities at the beginning of my new chapter: maybe a roommate, some possible job opportunities and I know, many friendships waiting to be formed. In January I will also start an amazing year long leadership program as well as continue leading a group of young adults for my third year in a row in a volunteer program. I know someone near and dear to me will be moving to another state; whether this is merely a geographical separation or not remains to be determined. While sad, I know it's just the beginning of the rest of my life and I'll be forever grateful for the kindness, respect and consideration I've always received. And the memories of being the happiest I've been will remain etched in my heart. And perhaps, I'll have more of that to look forward to. What is constant and abiding? As a dear friend of mine always says, "Adapt and overcome." There's only one thing we can do with each turn of the page, with each new chapter: look for the lesson you learned from each situation, adapt to new ways of thinking and experiencing and overcome future obstacles with what you have learned and experienced. I have had one great heartbreak in my life. This is not because I was so in love or because he deserved my love; in fact, he did not. It was so heart-wrenching because I was so naive and I had planned the rest of my life on him and he treated me so ungraciously, to be euphimistic. But today, a mere two and a half years later, I realise that I draw on that experience so frequently and with less of a knee-jerk reaction than I used to. I understand all the worst in men because of him. It was indeed, a hard lesson to learn and my heart bears the scars, but I'm glad I learned it when I did. I've had my share of bad bosses and managers and job situations. But now I know what I want from a job, a manager, a work environment. And I'm grateful for my first two bosses of my professional experience; they were more amazing than I had ever realised. I'd never be where I am now without them. If I had never lost my job, I'd never learn to rely on others. I'd never know the truest, sincerest expressions of gratitude. I have now had almost 5 straight months of introspection, transformation and mental and emotional recovery. I'm ready for my new chapter.

Saltimbocca alla Romana

This recipe is delicious, although I make it with chicken breast instead of veal. Eating veal (baby cows) just doesn't sound appealing to me. I've also made this without dredging it in flour and it's still very yummy.

Ingredients

• 4 (5-ounce) thinly sliced veal cutlets (scallopini)
• 4 slices thinly sliced prosciutto
• 8 fresh sage leaves, plus more for garnish
• All-purpose flour, for dredging
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
• 2 tablespoons unsalted butter
• 2 tablespoons dry white wine
• 1/4 cup chicken broth
• Lemon wedges, for serving

Directions

Put the veal cutlets side by side on a sheet of plastic wrap. Lay a piece of prosciutto on top of each piece of veal and cover with another piece of plastic. Gently flatten the cutlets with a rolling pin or meat mallet, until the pieces are about 1/4-inch thick and the prosciutto has adhered to the veal. Remove the plastic wrap and lay a couple of sage leaves in the center of each cutlet. Weave a toothpick in and out of the veal to secure the prosciutto and sage. Put some flour in a shallow platter and season with a fair amount of salt and pepper; mix with a fork to combine. Dredge the veal in the seasoned flour, shaking off the excess.

Heat the oil and 1 tablespoon of the butter and in a large skillet over medium flame. Put the veal in the pan, prosciutto-side down first. Cook for 3 minutes to crisp it up and then flip the veal over and saute the other side for 2 minutes, until golden. Transfer the saltimbocca to a serving platter, remove the toothpicks, and keep warm.

Add the wine to the pan, stirring to bring up all the delicious flavor in the bottom; let the wine cook down for a minute to burn off some of the alcohol. Add the chicken broth and remaining tablespoon of butter, swirl the pan around. Season with salt and pepper. Pour the sauce over the saltimbocca, garnish with sage leaves and lemon wedges; serve immediately.

Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

I hope this letter reaches you in time for you to bring me the right Christmas presents this year. I know I haven't written in a really long time and that's probably why I have been getting lumps of coal. Or is that because I don't visit my family enough and I've been put on the naughty list? This year, you can't blame me, blame Father Economy for getting me laid off and not having enough money to go home a lot. Also, the Broken Car Fairy used quite a bit of his damn fairy dust on me this year. This year I want a really awesome job. It can pay a lot of money, but if you don't have one of those models with the fancy title and big salary, I will take the plainer version that just pays my bills and has benefits. Since my mother taught me to be practical, I'll also ask for some thermal underwear, or long johns or whatever they are calling them these days. Some fur-lined slippers to go with these too, and this is what will keep me warm in my sub-zero dwelling. Whatever clothing you give the Eskimos would also probably be apropos. I like the colour pink now, in case you haven't been keeping track. My cats would really like a year's supply of those Dah Bird things. I know this might mean a lot of them, since they tear them to bits in three days, but they have been great lap warmers and bed warmers this year and deserve something really nice. Last year, I did get a great set of friends, and I wanted to thank you for those too. They have really come in handy. The Significant Other Bunny was also really nice to me this year; she is usually rather nasty but maybe she felt bad about the Father Economy thing. So the last thing I want, Dear Santa, is for all of my friends wishes to come true: babies, debt paid off, to find Mr. Right, the best ever food every day, good jobs and happiness. And, for my very special significant other who makes my heart so full of happiness, I just want him to be really, really happy too. Please let everything work out for him. He really deserves that for putting up with my crazy. I will leave out some Snowville Creamery milk because I know it's your favourite, and my homemade cookies, carrots for the reindeer and catnip for your cats (yes, I know about your love of cats). Thank you, Santa! Love, This Unemployed Person

Why I'd be a Great Personal Assistant

Dear Prospective Employer who is looking for the ultimate personal assistant, I would like you to know why I'm the best candidate for your position. Instead of burdening you with long, complex sentences, I'll give you the highlights of me and why I'm a smart, creative, focused individual with the ability to travel.

1. I don't have a spouse or children, therefore it's easy and quite delightful for me to travel with you whenever you need to. Also, I have a passport and have not been banned from any country.
2. Read my blog. You'll see that I'm a creative writer. I also like to do crafty things, sew, paint and other creative things. If you read my resume, you'll see that I have superb problem solving skills which demonstrates a different kind of creative.
3. As for the smart part, I graduated with honors from the Honors College of my university. I can also tie my own shoe laces, which I hear Albert Einstein could not do. I'm book smart, street smart, have common sense and I pick up on things very quickly.
4. I like helping others and this is why I'll love to help you and make your life easier. No chore too big or small for me. Every errand run is an adventure.
5. My telephone voice is very pleasant, calm and professional. That doesn't mean I can't put my foot down when necessary. The best part is, I know when it's necessary and when it shouldn't be done. Because I'm smart like that.
6. Food. If you like to eat, you'll enjoy having me as your personal assistant. Whether you like take-out, restaurants or a personal chef, I'm your girl. Need to find just the right place to take that as yet unattainable client? You'll seal the deal with my restaurant selections. And, I have a few connections to make memorable personal events such as anniversary or birthday meals.
7. Superior oral and written communication skills. That's straight from my resume. I'm well spoken and well written.
8. I'm well rounded. No, I'm not referring to my figure. I've travelled the world a bit, enjoy the arts, food, sports and so much more. I'm a master at conversation.
9. I have a good, healthy sense of humour. Not much in life can get me down after the last few months. Things will probably not always go according to plan, but no worries, we'll just laugh and reset. Also, I am quite the punster.
10. Organization. Well, I've got that one down pat. My significant other will tell you that my fridge is organized alphabetically. I'll correct him and say it's alphabetical by food type...Asian, BBQ...etc.
11. Excellent memory. This is absolutely necessary for any personal assistant. I will remember all these little things that would just bog you down and I will remind you of them. Birthdays, important dates, meetings we need to prepare for, whatever it is, I will remember it for you.
12. Appearance. A professional appearance in the front of the office (your personal assistant) is just as important as the back of the office (you). I will not disappoint you. I come from a professional background and have lovely, updated professional attire. And I have nice teeth.
13. If you're a coffee drinker, you'll begin to appreciate that I am in the office daily, before you, with coffee brewing and ready for you to begin your day.
14. Random information at hand. Oh yes, the queen of small talk I am, with my random information. This random information comes in handy when you need vinegar to take out that wine stain, or need to know that 1 quart is 4 cups, or that ammonia thrown in with towels will help remove that musty smell...I could go on, but you get the point.
15. I'm quite practical and pragmatic. I think that speaks for itself.

Bennies

I love filing for my unemployment benefits every week. No, not really. This process takes a mere thirty minutes. 28 of those minutes are spent waiting for the state's site to load. Then I am reminded, once again, that it is not enough to cover my mortgage, let alone my other expenses. Then I feel guilty for going out this weekend and having that beer. Then I feel depressed because I should be staying in, or not drinking and having a normal social life, because I shouldn't spend any more money. Then I am grateful for friends who have been more than generous and understanding. Then I just really, really wish I had a job. I've never avoided viewing my Mint account or my bank and credit card accounts online as much as I do now. I don't want it to verify that yes, in fact, I do spend my not really so discretionary money going to bars and the grocery store. Has my life in fact been reduced to eating and drinking? Are they my only comforts in life? Does that make me sound incredibly lame? I've cancelled my Netflix account today because I feel guilty for keeping myself entertained during my extensive unemployment. And did you know, your rental queue is maintained for 2 years in case you reactivate your account? Nice. Thanks for the mental image of destitution for two years. I'm continuing to buckle down even more. I know my heating bills are going to get very expensive over the next few months; it's supposed to be a very, very cold winter here and it's already begun. I won't allow temps over 65 degrees unless I have company and I am trying to reduce it to 63 degrees and 60 at night or when I'm not home. Santa, you can bring me that lump of coal...I'm gonna need it this year.

Patience is Not My Virtue

Patience is defined by dictionary.com as:

1.	the quality of being patient, as the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like.

2.	an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay: to have patience with a slow learner.

3.	quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care; diligence: to work with patience.

Shakespeare wrote, "How poor are they who have not patience! What wound did ever not heal but by degrees." I agree with the Bard. Heartaches, owies and the like heal with nothing but time and maybe a little (read: lots of) tequila or Neosporin. But hundreds of band-aids, a few tequila shots and countless heartaches into life, I still can't learn patience when it comes to things over which I have no control.

Yesterday, I felt like my life is one of those choose your own ending books. The only thing is, I'm having trouble choosing and I can't flip to the end to see if I like it or not. And, I am just not patient enough to wait it out. I want to know now, if I'm accepted to Harvard. I want to fast forward through taking the GRE, I want to fast forward through the next few months, I want it to be...well, next year sometime, when there is more stability in my life. On the subject of patience, Edmund Burke asserts, "Our patience will achieve more than our force." I hope, immensely, that he is not right about this. I'm better at forcing things to bend to my will, than patiently awaiting the arrival of the things I want most in life. Which is why I much prefer a quip captured from the esteemed Margaret Thatcher, a woman I have long admired, "I am extraordinarily patient, provided that I get my own way in the end." Damn Titus Maccius Plautus whose platitude on patience amounts to, "Patience is the best remedy for trouble." Yes, Titus, I have troubles but not the patience with which to bear them. George Jackson advises, "Patience has its limits; take it too far and it is cowardice." I ascribe to this philosophy; how long can I idly wait about, waiting for the future, waiting for what will be, to be? Today I see the value, the virtue, of patience. While my patience has been tried (and seriously found wanting), I see something else. I look back and see those beautiful moments that would not have occurred if I received everything immediately. I've learned to lean on those close to me, to reach out with genuine and sincere appreciation for those who so selflessly offer friendship, assistance and anything they can to help me through this difficult time in my life, and validate my self-worth by virtue of their loyal friendship to me. Those happy little moments that pass by so subtly, in retrospect become the most precious and breathtaking of all. I don't have much patience, but I do have many magnificent moments to remember.

Tweet, Tweet...bird, word

Follow me on Twitter...I have apparently succumbed to several requests for witty, snarky, clever Tweets via Twitter. This may be the result of waking up, staying awake and being productive at approximately 7:55am. You can find me @thisunlife.

What Unemployment Looks Like, Figure 1

Topic Suggestion #3: Sweaty Armpits

It's true, I have them. Sweaty armpits, that is. Well, until I come home to my sub-zero home. I fully expect to have icicles hanging from my exposed ducts. Yes, actually, they are supposed to be exposed, for aesthetics. But it's getting cold here in this city and I am trying to keep my heating bill down, so I have been trying (some days rather unsuccessfully) to keep my heat off, or at least at 60 degrees. No sweaty armpits at 60 degrees. Or, one would think. But, when you're unemployed, and in my situation, there are so many things to sweat over. Over all the times you really want to do things with your friends, but it costs money. Over those phone interviews, when your whole life, and budget, depends on you making money in the near future. Over the perfect rental candidate who came to view your condo, hoping he will bring his roommate to view the place, indicating serious interest in renting it so you don't have to pay the full mortgage any more. Over the handsome man, who increases your core body temp the minute you see him smiling, laughing, teasing you, giving you advice, being your rock when you really need him to be and because he makes you so happy and you can't wait to know everything, absolutely everything, about him even if it takes years or forever. You like forever, and it kinda gives you sweaty armpits. In a weird, romantic sort of way. Every time I open my mailbox, I get sweaty armpits too. This is definitely not due to romantic expectations. It's that nagging bill for the CAT scan I had due to a concussion given by some random person I didn't know while I didn't have health insurance. I can't bring myself to pay the $835 hospital fees, nevermind the radiologist and whatever else fees. I didn't even get drugs during the visit! And speaking of not having health insurance, that gives me sweaty armpits. I avoid people, unsafe people that I don't know, because I don't have health insurance. I've learned my lesson. Just thinking about all the options laying ahead of me gives me sweaty armpits. Grad school, moving, not moving, and the one I have the least control over: jobs. Feeling powerless over my future causes me to sweat. Nervousness induced sweaty armpits happen to be the worst. You have the sneaking suspicion that if you were to lift your arm, the world would see those sweat-stained armpits. And then, you are glad you're not in school where you might want to raise your hand. I'd have to get over my fear of speaking in class without raising my hand. But then, those sweaty armpits that I most desire to have: the ones caused by standing in front of the HKS building on my first day of classes. The ones induced by someone asking me to move to LA with him. The sweaty armpits you get, standing in front of a room of old men CEOs, while you, a petite and young woman, tell them how you will run their non-profit successfully. I'd love to have those sweaty armpits. The power and excitement induced sweaty armpits you get when you realize you're on top of the world. I wonder if I'll ever have that kind, ever again.... This post is for KC, in honour of her 33rd birthday. Thanks, KC, for the topic suggestion.

Ready or not...here I come...

It's been six days since my last post. Many things and decisions have transpired. Or, are in the process of transpiring. It does not appear that I have to worry about the job in Chicago. They have not called. I do not think I am ready to go to grad school and therefore am in the process of deciding not to take the GRE, yet, and perhaps will go off and do something like Teach for America or Peace Corp or find a job where I can travel and do some sort of international aid type thing. I'm taking suggestions. I really <3 my significant other person. I care about him very much. He is moving to LA. I just don't know if that's a possibility for me considering that if I don't go to grad school right now, I can't just lounge around. I really need to do something big and important (not just take another corporate job). This makes me kind of sad and wonder where or how things will go. He is rather lovely though. Thanksgiving was at my place this year, with my significant other person and two wonderful friends. All in all, the food was merely decent as I opted to not be overly gourmet (expensive) and made many things with stuff I already had at home. I love making things from scratch! I have put up a Christmas tree. I am unusually excited about Christmas this year. Very likely, because it will involve being home with the kitties, opening their presents for them, eating steak for dinner and whatever else. Oh, drinking wine. This past weekend I purchased window plastic and draft guards for my two doors. I am hoping that this will make my place a little more energy efficient, stay warmer and reduce my heating bill. September-October was $75, October-November was $83 and I am guessing November-December will be around $100. We'll see.

The End.

Food for Thought

I've done my fair share of complaining, whining and general exhibition of my unhappiness with my unfortunate situation. But as I drove by the local food pantry today and saw the long, long line of people standing out in the cold, waiting for their food, my eyes welled up with tears and my heart literally ached. I all but lost my breath. Yesterday, that local food pantry served over 2,600 families with about 108,000 pounds of food. That's about 7,300 people, about half of whom are children. They were opening again today from 8am til 6pm. Americans, on average, throw away over $600 of food every year. If you had to donate the cost of every food item that you threw out, how much would you donate at the end of the year? I

Cell Phones, Chicago and California

I had wanted to attempt a daily post, but alas, my attentions were once again distracted. This time by a full weekend spent with some of my greatest friends. And, the lovely significant other person who made my weekend by hanging out with my friends and me Friday night (graciously putting up with and participating in my crazy antics--finally, someone who doesn't mind them and in fact thinks they are funny), watching the UM/OSU game with me and my friends, taking me to dinner on Saturday night, and having breakfast with me Sunday morning. He is quite lovely, indeed. On my mind today first is my cell phone. I will admit to being "one of those people" who has an iPhone. In retrospect, I wish I'd never bought it. AT&T has bad 3G coverage, I drop calls a LOT and sometimes the phone just doesn't work. Also, the data plan is $30, the 450 minutes is $39.99, unlimited texting is $20. Basic service is $89.99 a month. I now need more than 450 minutes because only one friend I talk to is in the AT&T network that I can talk to for free (I think; I suspect it somehow doesn't really work that way). I need unlimited texting because yes, I really text that much. And the data plan with the iPhone is non-negotiable. With taxes and other nonsense fees, my bill is regularly $110+ a month. So I called AT&T to see if they would work with me, as I'm unemployed and need more minutes to call employers and the answer was pretty much a matter of fact, sorry, you're screwed because you have an iPhone. I can, however, pay to have the 900 minute plan and then get the 10 top people calling feature. Basically you choose 10 people you call the most and it's free to call them. The ridiculous thing is, if I could call those 10 people for free, I wouldn't need 900 minutes now, would I? No. Damn cell phone companies lure you, then lock you in. Until I decide what to do, my heat is staying off so I can handle paying my cell phone bill. Another item on my mind is a promising looking job in Chicago. Let's do a pros/cons list: Pros:

1. It's a job. The first job I have a decent chance of perhaps getting (at least an interview with) in four months.
2. It pays roughly what I was making before, plus benefits.
3. They are a very large company, with tens of billions in assets under management, with about 100 employees...sounds like my kind of firm.
4. Since they don't pay relo, I wouldn't have to repay it if I left before a year.
5. I'd be working again. And Chicago isn't a bad city compared to other possible options.
6. Flights from Chicago to LA are probably less expensive from here to LA.
7. I could go home more often since it'd only be a 3 hour train ride away.

Cons:

1. Chicago is really, really cold in the winter. Fierce winds, snow, the whole Arctic nine yards.
2. They don't pay relocation costs; I'd have to find a really cheap, cheap place to live with 2 cats. That's likely to be relatively tiny.
3. I'd have to rent out my condo or sell it; if I sell, I'd loose a LOT of money. It might take a while to find a renter, so I'd have to pay a mortgage plus rent in Chicago.
4. Chicago has a lot higher cost of living than where I am now.
5. It's not anywhere near my significant other person.
6. I would have fewer excuses not to go home since it'd only be a 3 hour train ride away.
7. I know people in Chicago, but haven't spoken to them in a few years. I'd have to make all new friends without really knowing anybody there.

It's going to be a tough, tough choice. There are other considerations here, but they are not for your eyes. Well, it depends on who you are, but mostly I prefer to keep a few personal elements private from all the prying eyes. Last on my mind is California. It's warm, promising and my signficant other person is moving to LA in February. I guess I don't have much more to say than that. Other than, if you have a job for me in LA, I'll take it.

Difficult, Easy

My mum always says, "It's all what you make of it." Today, I'm not making much of anything. I'm perhaps making a mess of my life and seeing it as immensely difficult. Everything, everything, everything is difficult. I need to send transcripts from three schools to prospective graduate schools. Since I haven't been in school for, oh, seven years, this involved getting my new student ID number from one school as they have stopped using students' SSN as a student ID. I had to reset all my logins for each school, choose a new PIN or password. This involved calling their technology help desks. If you've ever worked for a large corporation, you know what this can entail. I have to pay $7 per transcript to another school. And, two grad schools don't want your official transcripts delivered unless you're accepted, so one must upload the transcripts. This means getting a copy, scanning and uploading. Sadly, I do have all day for this kind of inanity. Relationships are so difficult. Friendships with people who have seemingly endless amounts of money to do anything or really just don't need to think about money. $50 for a concert, $15 for the weekly quiz night, happy hours, going out to dinner, shopping.... for me, it adds up to a lot more than my meager unemployment benefits. It pains me to write my mortgage payment check every month. It hurts to see the automatic withdrawals for my cell phone, cable and electric bills. It's difficult to have a social life. I tend to lean on my significant other person who doesn't go out too much, for human interaction and connection. I like this theoretically. Mostly because I adore him and when he is present, I feel like I never need to meet or be with anyone else for the rest of my life. It's really nice to just hang out and not worry about feeling guilty because he is paying and I can't afford to pay my fair share of the time. But, I'm a some-maintenance girl. Not high, not non, just a little bit. It's difficult for me to demand and receive what I want: to go out once in a while. Because then I'm viewed as the difficult, mean, yelling, demanding person. Once every other week, a movie, dinner, a walk around the mall...why is that difficult? Difficult to turn the heat on because it will cost money; difficult to pile on layers of clothes instead. Difficult to go shopping because food is expensive; difficult to find anything to eat when you're hungry. Difficult to explain to your family why you can't drive home for the holidays; difficult to justify spending $90+ in gas money for a day with your difficult family. Difficult to have a social life; difficult to be good company; difficult to see the end of all troubles; difficult to find a job; difficult to be a good friend or girlfriend; difficult to find your self-worth; difficult to get out of bed every morning and face the day; difficult to deal with complicated people and situations; difficult to enjoy life; difficult to even cry about it all. When everything else is difficult, one thing is easy: for me to feel sorry for myself. And I do, today. It's easy for me to feel alone, completely isolated. Easy to feel powerless, to struggle. Easy to figure out who your friends are. Easy to wonder when will this ever end? Easy...to give up.

Wednesday

Sorry, sports fans, for not posting a post yesterday. I was distracted. I wonder where the time goes? The past few weeks that I have been meeting my friend and writing partner have all but flown by. I have exactly 22 days until I take the GRE...again. I really need to buckle down and study a lot more. I think I have an inflated sense of confidence, having taken it once before, six years ago. I also need to have recommendations written for grad school and complete my essays. My motivation usually kicks in at the last minute. Fortunately, I have till January 15 to complete my applications. Oh, and I need to get transcripts to the schools. So, so much to do and I really do have all day to make it happen. I just need to get on it. Feel free to send kicks in the pants. They are welcomed.

10+ Reasons to be Unemployed

I really do just love lists:

1. You can spend all day honing your cooking and baking skills. Plus, your friends will love you when you demand they eat your food.
2. What better excuse to have a cocktail party? You have no where to be tomorrow.
3. You have all day to study for the GRE and write grad school essays. Unfortunately, most of the time you're completely distracted by #1 because it's way more fun with immediate gratification.
4. You have more time to devote to texting, calling, emailing and general harrassment of your significant other. This also means more time to endlessly analyze what he really meant by, "of course I like you" last night.
5. Since you have no where to drive, you do not risk running into deer in the middle of the highway, road or wherever else you could possibly run across (or into) them with a car. This is especially notable during the fall and winter months. If you can choose when to be unemployed, not a bad option.
6. You can "visit family." This is really the unemployed person's euphemism for, "I'm not going anywhere I just don't want to be seen or bothered while I lay on the floor for days, crying my eyes out." This typically happens immediately after unemployment commences.
7. Your pets, if you have any, will L-O-V-E you F-O-R-E-V-E-R because they will think you took 10 months off to be at home with them. If you don't have a pet, now is the time to get one or two. Fish don't count.
8. You will be able to learn everything you ever wanted to know via the History Channel, NatGeo, HGTV, TLC, Food Network etc., etc. Learn how to Design on a Dime, about the lives of The Little Couple, all about Cleopatra and the end of the Ptolemic era, bats, and much more.
9. You now have time to clean your entire house, top to bottom. This is likely to only occur after 1 through 8 are accomplished.
10. No more bad bosses. Need I say more?
11. Catch up on reading; particularly books you were supposed to read for your honors classes in college. Next time you hit up an alumni event or contact your old prof for a grad school recommendation, you don't have to pretend to understand the similarities and differences in the paintings and writings of contemporaries Thomas Cole and James Fenimore Cooper, respectively.
12. You will learn extreme budgeting skills. $1000 in benefits minus $800 for rent leaves you $200 for anything else you want to spend money on.
13. You will hone your Google techniques and be able to find info, images and more on the most obscure, abstruse, obfuscated, esoteric, tenebrous subjects in the world.
14. You will have time to learn words such as obscure, abstruse, obfuscated, esoteric, and tenebrous.
15. Do you need another reason?

A picture is worth a thousand words...

Topic Suggestion 2: Blimps

Happy Friday the 13th. Today's blog post will be about blimps, by request. Thank you, AB, for the suggestion. Perhaps the most famous blimp event of all time, the Hindenburg crash, is put to shame by the instantaneous and complete destruction unemployment has on one's life. If you watch the crash, you'll see how practically spontaneous it is. You never see it coming. And suddenly, the fabled blimp is engulfed in flames and billowing smoke. Being laid off is similar. On that fateful day, you walk into the office for the last time. Ever. And what starts as a fire turns into one of the worst catastrophes in the world, as Herbert Morrison would describe the event on May 6, 1937. Well, it certainly becomes the worst catastrophe of your own life. The Hindenburg lost 36 people total lost their lives in the the crash. I'm sure I could list 36 things I've lost by way of losing my job. The list would include pride, motivation, purpose, income, direction, stability, consistency, co-workers (not necessarily a complaint).... and the list could go on. But, as did after the Hindenburg crash, life goes on. You pick up the pieces and move on with something new. The memory of it hangs in the background, like Hangar One. You are never again the same. And that's okay. Some things really do need to burn to the ground.

Topic Suggestion 1: Crazy, Jesus Freak, Vegan Cat Lady

Today my Facebook status update issued a challenge: suggest a topic, any topic, and no matter how weird, bizarre, normal or mundane, I would write about it and relate it to unemployment. Guaranteed. And if I couldn't, I'd cook you dinner. So expect to see some interesting posts over the next week or however long it keeps going. I may institute a first 10 topic suggestions, depending on how many I get. Here's the first topic: crazy, Jesus freak, vegan cat lady. Unemployment has a way of turning you into a crazy, Jesus freak, vegan cat lady. I know this from experience, in fact. Crazy...well, maybe I wasn't too far from stepping in the crazy pool to begin with. I like to say I'm quirky. My family will readily admit to my crazy. It's there; it's definitely there. I daydream about becoming Secretary of State, where diplomatic matters are conducted in my kitchen, over freshly baked cookies and a glass of milk. I mean seriously, isn't everything made better by fresh cookies and a tall, cold glass of milk? I really think we could solve a lot of foreign diplomacy issues like this. As for the Jesus freak part, I respectfully decline from using this term and prefer to say I am a person of my faith. Crazy has infiltrated every aspect of my life, unemployment having turned all my plans on end, chaos and confusion reigning supreme. Job, a current favourite Biblical character at such a time as this, was advised by Eliphaz the Temanite in Job 22:21, "Acquaint now thyself with Him and be at peace: thereby good shall come unto thee." It's a command that's been a comfort to me. But I also like Job's response in Chapter 23, especially in verse 14: "For he performeth the thing that is appointed for me: and many such things are with him." I'm up for following Jesus; I wouldn't be able to get through this difficult, Job-esque time in my life without my faith. And now I'm just waiting for the good to come to me. Vegan is theoretically easy to turn into; meat is expensive! I have not, yet, turned into a vegan. It's actually doubtful. I'm quite carnivorous. But, I can see how one would, in times of need and desperation, cut out meat altogether. But there are ways to stretch your meat, rather than eliminate it altogether. Goetta, is for example, one of those ways. But ruining a perfectly good ground beef with a filler such as oatmeal doesn't really sound appetizing either. I remain, staunchly, not-yet-vegan. I just eat more cheap, generic brand cereal and pasta. Lastly, but certainly not least....cat lady!! Did someone just call my name?! I had cats before my unemployment commenced. I have, however, become more of a cat lady, if only in the eyes of my cats (i.e. at home). I refrain from resembling or epitomizing cat lady in public as much as possible. I'm still single. My mum is afraid of me becoming the crazy cat lady who's 50 and has a dozen cats. Yes, she is genuinely afraid of this. I do like to yank her chain a bit by casually mentioning I may get another cat. But since I've been home a lot more often, I find they keep me great company. They follow me around the house, and actually, lately, have been fighting for my attentions. This can really only be interpreted as a sign that I am a true cat lady. So...let me bask in being a crazy, person of faith, not-yet-vegan, cat lady. And thank you, MJ, for the topic suggestion.

Career Transition Plan 1: Bollywood Actress

A while ago, I was modeling for a photographer friend of mine. I realised I am probably (not probably, I really am) a bad poser; it felt awkward and unnatural to pose. But, we had such an interesting conversation. I was considering changing careers, talking about blogging and writing and you know how these things go. The next thing I knew, I was talking about trying to become a Bollywood actress. This is funny for two reasons: I'm blonde and definitely not Indian. But here are my foolproof steps to becoming a Bollywood actress:

1. I will attempt to become a Bollywood actress and chronicle my experience on my blog.
2. Somewhere, somehow, someone will have an actual Bollywood connection and connect me.
3. Because I would seem exotic, I'd actually be cast in a Bollywood movie as a mute, initially, before I learned Hindi.
4. Learn Hindi, be cast into speaking roles.
5. Make lots of money, move to India and enjoy popularity as a Bollywood actress.
6. Bring Bollywood to the common people in the U.S. Enjoy success as the person who did this.
7. Never need to work every again. Continue blogging.

Like I said, foolproof. Now....anyone have a Bollywood connection?

Jobless Drumettes

They are quick, inexpensive and easy to make. And since multi-tasking is the name of the game, they marinate and bake all while you job search. 1/2 cup of basalmic vinegar 1/2 cup of brown sugar 1/2 cup of honey 1/4 cup of soy sauce rosemary...fresh sprigs or dried as much or little garlic cloves, halved, as you like 8-12 chicken drumettes Mix up all the ingredients in a re-sealable bag, shake or stir to dissolve the honey and brown sugar. You can marinade all day if you like, but at least 1-2 hours to let all the flavours soak in. Line a baking sheet (I use a jelly roll pan) with foil. Place the drums on the foil lined pan (you will free up more time for job searching or watching the foodnetwork instead of scraping off bits of carmelized marinade if you do this). Bake at 425 degrees F for about 30 minutes. Save the marinade. During the last 5 minutes of baking, put the marinade in a skillet and bring to a boil to kill bacteria. After boiling for a minute or so, remove from heat and let rest. It should be a thicker, glaze-like consistency. Brush onto drumettes when they're finished baking. If you used rosemary sprigs, don't put these in the marinade when you boil it. You can sprinkle the drumettes with sesame seeds if you like, for a nice crunchy texture. If you used dried rosemary needles in the marinade, I recommend not topping with sesame seeds as it will already be coated with the rosemary needles. *Giada, you may take credit for this recipe as it is one of yours that I slightly adapted. Readers, click on title for link to www.foodnetwork.com.

Landing a Job Like Getting into Harvard

If Samuel Sherradan is correct, my odds don't look too promising either way (click blog title for article on CNN.com). After finding myself unhappy in my accidental career, I sought the advice of career counselor David Goodenough of the Goodenough Company. He suggested that I was actually an adventurous, free-spirited type. And, he concluded, I was under-educated for my intellect. I kind of like the sound of that. He suggested the Kennedy School of Government at Harvard. I am in the process of applying and studying for the GRE for the second time in my life. But after reading this article by Mr. Sherradan, I wonder if it is better that I sell all my belongings, find a new home for the cats, and wander the world like a vagabond until the job market improves. While trying to comprehend the staggering statistic of 30 million underemployed, discouraged and unemployed human beings in the United States, I discovered what else 30 million stands for:

• 30 million iPhones sold by early 2009
• Google's Chrome browser now boasts 30 million users.
• Firefox gained 30 million users in 8 weeks
• There are over 30 million users on Facebook
• Novartis, a Swiss drugmaker, is sending the U.S. 30 million H1N1 vaccine shots
• 30 million Americans cannot get insurance

Well, I know that sums up my life: I use my iPhone to make calls to recruiters, try to find how I can get affordable health insurance, search for health clinics where I can get the H1N1 vaccine using Firefox, then I update my Facebook status using Google Chrome. Mr. Sherradan, what are my chances of finding a job and getting into Harvard?

This is MY blog, you can't lay me off!

Does that title make sense? Meh, oh well. I know what I mean. I had no control over being laid off, but I certainly have control over my blog. I like having control. I will admit to being a control freak. But a nice, not crazy, control freak. I promise.

Well, it's been about 4 months since I was let go from my job from a very small company. I feel lost, dazed, confused and unsure of myself or where I'm about to go and what I should be doing. I'm like a missing person. My motivation, self-confidence and usual aplomb in life are all missing! Where, oh where, did they go? I requested their pictures be placed on milk cartons, but alas, even the milk carton people did not think they could be found. I didn't think it could or would happen to me. I'm successful, funny, smart, hard-working and I love diversity in the workplace. I'm the perfect employee. I love to manage people and I'm really good at it. Plus, I cook and bake things to bring in to the office. 'd give Martha Stewart a run for her money. Martha, let's have a competition. I'll host a party. You host a party. Let's see whose party is better. I never wondered, til now, what unemployed people do with all that time! 24 full hours, every day, of not having to do anything! It was at first, blissful. Well, okay, that was after I spent the weekend moping, crying and angry. Yes, I was let go on a Friday morning. Everyone knows you should do it on a Monday, but whatever. Reality is slowly setting in. And so, I've been wondering, if you're unemployed, how did you know how to file for unemployment, how to fill your time, how to get support from loved ones, who would understand your plight, who could you talk to about how you feel, and aren't there any support groups for this awful disease called unemployment? And really, didn't you want to kick the hell out of something or someone? Did you? I want to hear from you. Oh, you'll be hearing from me. I'll let you know what I do from day to day. And, TLC, if you're reading, I want my own reality show about my unemployed life here in the Midwest. I can't believe you, or some other network, doesn't have a reality show about an unemployed person yet. TLC, you can be the first.