Home is Where the Heart is

Life is once again as it should be.  Having been reunited with my cats early this morning, around 2am, I feel at home once again while at the same time missing NYC immensely.  My sister's wedding in Portland, ME this weekend was beautiful.  The setting was Portland Head Light in the background of the sailboat, within inches of the Atlantic Ocean.  I only say inches because if I thought, for a moment, that I was in the ocean, I would have had a panic attack.  The bride was gorgeous, the groom was handsome and the guests were delightful.

After a day of touring the Maine coast, we headed back to my "home" city.  We being my parents and I.  A long 16 hour car ride later, we arrived at Casa de Me.  It was so strange seeing the cats again and it took them just a little bit to adjust to me, sniff everything and get used to me again, but I could tell they were delighted to have company.  In fact, they have not left my side once since I have been home.  Fiona is perched next to me, within inches, anywhere I settle and softly purring almost constantly.  Portia is lazily lounging nearby as well and both follow me whenever I get up.  It feels like home, but then again it doesn't feel like home.

I had coffee with my friend who was cat sitting for me and we had so much to catch up on; but it was so easy and so wonderful to see him once again.  It was like no time had passed at all.

After spending six weeks in NYC, I feel particularly rejuvenated.  I am so fortunate that I had the means with which to do the trip, make friends and make a success out of the temporary stay.  No, I did not get a job in NYC, but I gained my confidence back.  It feels good knowing I made the right decision to go there.  Now, I feel like I can do anything.  I never have to wonder if I could make it in a big city.  I never have to look back and regret not taking a chance.

And, while all the personal satisfaction of doing a great thing is rewarding, what I am most happy about is seeing my friends again.  It has been a difficult road, this unemployment thing, losing friends, sometimes keeping myself secluded, being sad and depressed, and on and on....the whole range of emotions, ups and a lot of downs.  But the support I have had from everyone, whether they have seen me off or are welcoming me back, or both...I am eternally grateful and happy that I know some of the most amazing people.  

Between those who I have met and who have helped me in NYC, and those back home who have supported me through thick and thin, I have made a lifetime of friends.  EB, KK, GG, ED, AD, SL, SR, SR2, TS, SC....I'm sorry if I missed anyone, and the list could definitely go on.  

It is hard knowing that I will soon move on even from this place, to start a new chapter of my life.  But I am strong.  I am ready.  And as for where I will call home?  Well, home is where the heart is.