$3,157.62 = my latest hospital bill. Oddly, as I opened the bill, unhurriedly and unworriedly, I did not have a dollar figure in my mind, as I usually do when I open bills and anticipate the bleeding of my savings. I merely dropped an f-bomb (sorry mum) and said, "oh well." Did you know a CT Scan costs $1,700? Just being in the ER is a mere $750. And General Therapeutic Service is $90. I am uncertain what that general therapy was. It sounds like I should have gotten a foot massage while I was there and as out of it as I was, I'm certain I didn't get one. I did, however, get a $2,105.08 discount for self pay. Very nice.
I was an excellent patient, providing the nurses with intelligent conversation, entertainment with my slurred speech and I even got up to get my own ice once. Well, that was because I couldn't find the "get the nurse quick" button. Perhaps I will send them my bill for General Intelligent Conversation ($340), Light Entertainment ($120) and Being Graced With My Presence (Priceless). I guess that means they owe me. Oh, and it's due on February 19. Thank you very much.
Posts
This made me laugh - Love the humor. In my spare time, I think I might start making bills for "qualities of me" too. As for the Therapeutic Service... could it be an advil? They charge outrages amounts for the most basic over-the-counter meds.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad they gave you that discount, it makes the total on par with what an insurance negotiated rate would be. I should know. And I know it doesn't help, but if I went to the ED, I would have the same bill to pay ... I have a $3,200 deductible.
ReplyDelete